Sometimes When We Touch
by kitty kat7
Summary: Just another one of those ‘Whatever really happened to Leslie’ stories.


Ok... I had this idea hit me at like 12:00 in the morning a few days ago when   
I was lying in bed staring at the ceiling. It hasn't left me yet so I decided   
I should do something about it. This is the first fan fic I actually have ever   
thought about publishing. So bear with me.  
  
I don't own a thing in here. They belong to WB and Shoot the Moon and the   
song belongs to Dan Hill.   
  
Title: Sometimes When We Touch   
Date: 07/09/2001  
  
Summary: Just another one of those 'Whatever really happened to Leslie' stories.   
  
Takes place after Lee comes home following the incident with the guy at   
Trans Oceanic but before he asks Amanda to dinner.   
  
Lee's Apartment  
12:00AM  
  
He'd called to let Leslie know that he'd be late getting back and after the way   
the evening had gone before he left he was fairly surprised to find her still in   
his apartment. When Lee Stetson dragged in after the debriefing he found Leslie   
still in the dress and lying on his bed. He ran his hand through his hair and looked   
down at her. Boy, she looks like... Amanda he thought. No... no she doesn't.   
She looks like Leslie O'Connor, a UN Translator... besides Amanda's much prettier.   
  
The last thought scared the hell out of him. He looked around the room to   
make sure he was talking to himself before looking down to make sure Leslie was   
still sleeping. Finding that she was and he was alone, Lee opted against crawling   
in to bed beside her and decided to spend the rest of the evening on the couch.   
Man, this had been one screwed up day... first the crack Francine Desmond made about   
his looking like 'the midnight rambler', then the look on Amanda's face, Spring   
Cleaning and the Save Our Bay rally, and the bomb. The bomb... 'It was like running into   
a brick wall, and I wasn't even all that close.' Amanda King's words floated through his   
thoughts. He knew exactly what she meant. When he got the call saying that there had been   
a bombing at the rally, he felt like he'd run into a brick wall. The thought of loosing   
Amanda was more than he could handle. "She's just a friend... a very good friend but   
a friend..." he said out loud to the couch that he was lying on.   
  
If she's just your friend, your very good friend... why is it so hard for you   
to say that... that little nagging voice asked. if she's just a friend, a very good   
friend why do you need to repeat it to yourself as if even you don't believe it?   
"Uggh!" he had had enough of the thoughts that had been whipping around his head   
since that bomb went off and the silence in the apartment was just adding to the   
problem. Lee wandered aimlessly around the room for a few moments before he turned   
on the stereo and sat back down on the couch. It was down low so it wouldn't wake   
Leslie but up high enough that he could hear it with no trouble.   
  
Leslie... why hadn't he just gone to bed? Hell, it's his bed and it's not   
the first time there's been someone else in it. But it was the first time that the   
one in his bed looked like... "Amanda..." (Outside of the reoccurring dream he'd been   
having lately) He thought about the dream again and sighed as he ran an agitated hand   
through his hair again. He was becoming thoroughly annoyed with the fact that Amanda   
had to be on his mind constantly... not only that he had to see her at work every day.   
Lee rolled over on his stomach and put one of the pillows over his head trying to   
block out the thoughts.   
  
After about an hour of suffocating himself to the point of near unconsciousness   
he moved the pillow and fell asleep. He was dreaming again... New Years... that blasted   
party... why did she have to look so good in that dress... the dress that almost (and   
with every intent possible) looked like the one on the woman that was sleeping in his   
bed. But no... it wasn't her in the dress it was Amanda... and he just had to go and   
open his big mouth and ask her about it. He turned over in his sleep, but the dream   
only got worse. Now he was popping the cork on that damn bottle of wine and just had   
to go and call Leslie 'Amanda'. At least she had been sympathetic and played it off   
as his just talking about work. He turned back over and was plagued with the near kiss   
that was interrupted by the phone. All and all he had to admit to himself that he was   
glad the call came when it did, cause the whole time he was sitting with Leslie he   
was thinking about Amanda.   
  
With one final toss and hopes of blocking the whole day out of his memory, Lee   
turned over. Forgetting he was on the couch he rolled just a little too far and landed   
on the floor with a thud. "Well, that was sure to wake her up..." he muttered. He didn't   
feel like dealing with Leslie, his mind was just too tired. He waited a few moments and   
then snuck back to his room to see if she had gotten up. Nah, Leslie was down for the   
count. She still appeared to be sound asleep... to test that theory, Lee moved silently   
further into the room and leaned over her. "Pssst..." he tried. When she snuggled further   
down under the covers, he figured he was lucky enough to slip out of the room again   
without her knowing he was in there.   
  
Lee dragged back into the living room. There was a slow song on the radio that had   
a familiar tune. He walked closer to the stereo and turned it up just a bit. It was just   
coming on and it reminded him of some... "Amanda..." he shook his head as the singer started   
in on the first line.   
  
You ask me if I love you  
And I choke on my reply  
I'd rather hurt you honestly  
Than mislead you with a lie  
  
Though she never asked if he lo-lo-lo... it... he was sure he'd choke to death if   
she did ask if he... it. Of course he never wanted to hurt her and never wanted to knowingly   
lie to her. "Uggh!" this night was becoming worse by the minute. He didn't know how much   
of the song he'd missed but the next few lines scared the living day lights out of him.   
  
And sometimes when we touch  
The honesty's too much  
And I have to close my eyes and hide  
I wanna hold you till I die  
Till we both break down and cry  
I wanna hold you 'til the fear in me subsides  
  
"Oh... my... gosh..." Lee dropped on to the couch. Jeez, now I even sound like her!   
He thought. Lee decided to just wait out the rest of the song because no matter how much   
he wanted to change the station, the song had some kind of mysterious hold on him just   
like... "No! I'm not saying it this time... no... no... no..."  
  
Romance and all its strategy  
Leaves me battling with my pride  
But through the insecurity   
Some tenderness survives  
I'm just another writer  
Still trapped within my truth  
A hesitant prizefighter  
Still trapped within my youth  
  
And sometimes when we touch  
The honesty's too much  
And I have to close my eyes and hide  
I wanna hold you till I die  
Till we both break down and cry  
I wanna hold you 'til the fear in me subsides  
  
At times I'd like to break you   
And drive you to your knees  
At times I'd like to break through  
And hold you endlessly  
  
And sometimes when we touch  
The honesty's too much  
And I have to close my eyes and hide  
I wanna hold you till I die  
Till we both break down and cry  
I wanna hold you 'til the fear in me subsides  
  
Bingo! That was it... that was his whole problem... FEAR! He listened closely   
hoping the DJ would tell who the song was by but naturally he didn't. Lee sighed. He wanted  
Amanda to hear that song... he needed Amanda to hear that song. Blindly, as if he had every   
intention of doing it from the beginning he moved to the telephone to call the station and  
ask who sang the song. Lee stood by the table with the phone in his hand and his mouth   
hanging open. The voice of the person on the other end of the line brought him back to   
reality. "Yes..." he said giving himself a good physical and mental shake. "Dan Hill...   
ok, thanks a lot." He hung up the phone and found himself walking toward the stereo.   
Frantically, he began searching through the collection of 'mood music' that he had. The song   
sounded so familiar and he swore he had a copy somewhere. "Ha ha..." Lee grabbed the one   
Dan Hill album in his collection and flipped it over. There it was... 'Sometimes When We   
Touch'.   
Feeling better than he had in a long time, Lee turned the album on and fell asleep   
listening to the song.   
  
Around 7:30AM  
  
The morning sun was coming in through the now open curtains and he could smell   
coffee. Coffee was just what he needed. Lee dragged himself in the kitchen to find Leslie   
making breakfast. "Good morning, Mon Cheri..." she purred as she kissed him on the cheek.   
"You must've gotten in late last night... I never even heard you come in."  
  
Lee ran his hand through his hair and reached for his coffee cup. "Yeah... late...   
say, did you happen to turn off the stereo?"  
  
She nodded. "Yes, It was playing when I woke up and I figured you must've fallen   
asleep with it on."  
  
He fixed his coffee and sat down at the table. "Uh, Leslie we need to talk about   
tonight..."  
  
"Oh, I was going to tell you about that last night... though the dress is lovely   
it's just not my style and I'm surprised to find that it's yours..."  
  
You ain't the only one... "Well, uhm... I just uh-"  
  
"Oh, don't get me wrong, Lee, it's wonderful and was a thoughtful gesture but it's   
just a little too... I don't know what the word is..." she sighed and twisted her hair   
around her index finger. "Please don't take this the wrong way but it's a little frumpier   
than what I'm used to."  
  
"FRUMPIER!?" Lee shouted then started laughing. "Frumpier..." if that didn't sound   
like Francine he didn't know what did!   
  
"I'm sorry... I'm not getting your point... what's funny about that?" she looked at   
him quizzically.  
  
"Oh... it's nothing." He said still chuckling. Lee stopped laughing and thought for   
a few seconds. "You know I don't think it's frumpy at all." He snapped. Amanda hadn't   
looked 'frumpy' in the dress and as a matter of fact she never did in anything she ever wore.  
  
Leslie looked at him for a second. "Well, maybe that wasn't the word I was looking   
for... but it's just not-"  
  
"Your style... hey, I understand... but I happen to like it."   
  
Leslie sighed. "Ok... Now, what were you going to say about tonight?"  
  
"Uh... I was just going to say that uhm... well, I am really beat and I wouldn't be   
much company tonight so... why don't you just uh go on without me and have a nice time..."   
Besides I want to see Amanda... Lee was so afraid he said it out loud that he actually   
slapped himself.   
  
"Lee, darling, what is your problem this morning..."   
  
"I uh... fly... it was a fly."  
  
"I didn't see anything..."  
  
"That's cause it wasn't flying around you." He said nodding as he finished his   
coffee.   
  
Leslie stood up and put her hands on her hips. "Would this fly happen to have brown   
hair and work with you?" she asked tilting her head to one side and looking at him with an   
amused look on her face. "Is your fly's name Amanda?"  
  
Lee's jaw dropped. He'd been caught. "Well, I uh... no, it was a fly." He said   
finding that his voice held too much a defensive tone to be believed.   
  
"Don't worry, Lee... your secret is safe with me." Leslie kissed his cheek again   
and then turned to walk off. Before she got all the way out of the kitchen she turned back   
to him. "Lee, promise me one thing... hmm?" he looked up at her and shuffled his feet. "Make  
yourself happy and the girls you will date in the future, if there are any, just tell Amanda  
and get Lee Stetson off the market cause you won't be happy until you tell her."  
  
"Yeah..." he nodded and she walked into his room to gather her things. A few moments   
later she walked to the door and gave him one last smile and then she was gone. Lee took a   
deep breath and sighed. "Pull yourself together, Scarecrow..." he walked over to the   
stereo and grabbed a cassette tape. He was going to record that song and give it to Amanda...  
someday.   
  



End file.
